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Monday, May 16, 2005

No War for Oil...Deal?

The other day I stopped at the gas station to fill up, and as I handed over the $40 it costs to top off my tank, I found myself wondering, "What ever happened to our 'War for Oil'?" I was informed by numerous protesters that I'd be swimming in a sea of cheap gas by now, thanks to Bush's petroleum crusade. I don't remember buying a car with a 100 gallon tank since then, so what could account for the $40 fill up? I haven't heard any retractions from the activist community, so I must be missing something right?

Well, it turns out they were right after all God bless'm. Every major news outlet in the world is reporting today that high ranking officials in the Russian government, all the way up to Honest Vlad Putin, received bribes in the form of oil vouchers from one Saddam Hussein. This comes less than a week after French government officials were accused of the same. According to recently released reports, these officials received bribes in exchange for a pledge to use their positions on the U.N. Security Council to end sanctions against Iraq and veto any resolution to invade the country.

If only we hadn't dismissed those protesters just because they're unemployed, unkempt, and generally unhinged. They were trying to warn us the whole time that we couldn't trust France and Russia's intentions. No matter how much diplomacy we tried (sorry Sen. Kerry), these countries had already made a deal: No War for Oil.

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